Ducky Dogs

While I have been known to eat hot dogs with chili and cheese I generally prefer them with yellow mustard and sweet relish. There was a time in my life when I would eat four or five hot dogs four or five times a week. Now, not so often, mainly because of my growing (morbid) obsession with my ever-expanding belly, though I have to admit I am beginning to be concerned with what they are made of as well. Minnie tells me that the part of our brain that fully comprehends consequences does not completely develop until we are well into our twenties. Mine apparently is developing a little more slowly, an occurrence that is admittedly a bit disconcerting but that I am nevertheless grateful for.

I generally like "Dirty Water" dogs (those boiled in water flavored by the other dogs cooked that day) more than dogs that are steamed, fried, or grilled, though I am not a snob about such things. Of course it goes without saying that the bun must be steamed. When I am cooking at home I buy Hebrew National's all-beef franks, which are made with 100% kosher beef (better cuts of meat processed cleanly) that contain no artificial flavors, no artificial colors, no by-products, and no fillers. I generally boil three links for a few minutes (until they are crisp), then put each of them in their own bun topped with mustard and relish. Of course milk is the (absolutely required) drink of choice.

On a side note, the lawyer in me believes that it is appropriate at this point to make the following DISCLAIMER: "Ducky (Author) is not, nor has he ever been, employed by Hebrew National, Inc. (Company) nor any of said Company's subsidiaries. Furthermore, said Author does not hold, and has never held, any financial or other pecuniary interest in said Company nor any of said Company's subsidiaries. Said Author is simply of the opinion that the products of said Company are yummy."

I have a dream of one day opening a hot dog stand in Austin, to be named of course Ducky Dogs. Every detail of this my true calling is firmly cemented in my brain. As you would suspect Minnie supports each and every one of my dreams, though she has made it perfectly clear that her support of this endeavor will be that of the hands-off variety. Apparently she has paid her dues in the food service industry and thus will only be available to cheer me on from afar. Even promises of naming a vegetarian dog the "Minnie Dog" has not to this point changed her attitude about the glory of slinging dogs in a shop of our own creation. While I find her reluctance a bit disappointing, my study of history reminds me that the greatest of men have often had to pursue their passions on their own. While my drive for greatness may ultimately be along such a lonely road, I have no choice but to slog on, knowing that there are few callings more important that providing a good dog to a hungry populous.